Unfathomable depths

All day yesterday my mind was constantly on the fact that it was Good Friday. That on that day thousands of years ago Jesus went to the cross for me. And I cannot, to this day fathom how major that is. When I first heard about Jesus and his dying for my sins i was a kid and it was even more confusing to me then. All I understood was that some guy had gone and died for me. I didn’t understand why. I mean what had he done to deserve that? Why did he die for me, if he was innocent? What was it that made me so deserving that He’d go and die for me? It wasn’t right, it wasn’t fair. Now I understand why. It was love. 

Love that drove Him to continue onward despite knowing what was to come. Jesus could’ve checked out at anytime. He could’ve brought angels down form the heavens to tend to his wounds on the cross and show the glory of the Lord to the masses that day. Jesus also could’ve checked out at the garden of gethsemane. Jesus could’ve gone “Look this is a little much and I’m sorry but they’re not heir own!”.  In the movie “The Last Temptation of Christ” it shows a scene at the end where Jesus does check out. He comes off the cross, marries Mary Magdalene and lives a happy life as a carpenter. 

But the word is plunged in darkness. Mankind is in constant evil, turmoil and war with no hope. EVil abounds and Satan won. But you realize the end of the movie is actually a vision and Jesus is still on the cross, paying for the sins of the world in love and obedience. That’s another thing too that drove Him. The Father’s will and understanding of it by the Holy Spirit. Jesus knew it was the Father’s will, that it’d hurt and He still went forward.

I cannot fathom that. Any of it. how powerful, how strong, how AMAZING is the love of God for us? That Jesus went to the cross, that God loved us and gave His only Son and that by His death the Holy Spirit lives in us and we are called children of the living God?! WHAT? No way. My sin put him there and He stills loves me. That’s major and so unfathomable. Yet here I am, and here we all are. Saved by his sacrifice. Saved by holy and innocent blood. I am so undeserving and so often unthankful.  Yet He loved me and gave Himself for me. Oh thank you Lord.