An Answer to Absolution

I wrote a few weeks back a note called Absolution. I was in a state when something from my past was brought up and thrown at me and it just brought back a lot of crap. It reminded me of every mistake, every stupid choice, wrong move and evil I've done. It brought back the voices and ghosts I've tried so hard to forget and kill. Then after that, at church, a fellow sister took form me my notebook I write my thoughts and what I hear in church in and wrote something in it. This is what she wrote in it:

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

Romans 8:1

I was surprised to say the least that she had suddenly wrote this to me, out of the blue. I started thinking about it and was trying to follow the pastor's message as well but what I came to was this: Peace abounds, I'm forgiven and the Lord has forgiven me. Despite people remembering my short comings, my mistakes and bad actions, God has forgiven me for those and doesn't hold them against me. I'm free from those. I often have a hard time forgiving myself for the things I have done but God has forgiven me and that gives me peace. I understand now people aren't always going to forget though they may forgive. I guess that is something we'll have to live with but it is honestly better than the alternative.